Shhhhhh. . .

"You're spending alot on tobacco these days. Are you feeling a little stressed out?" Most people have a bartender, shrink or psychic. I have a tobaccanist named Randy. Such was the question posed by Randy as I purchased a Padron 5000 today for lunch. My third Padron in about 2 weeks. Apparently my "All-is-Well" facade wasn't as convincing as I thought. Funny thing about facades, they only seem to fool the ones hiding behind them.

"Are you stressed out about the engagement?", he asked.If there is anything in this world I'm more at peace with, it's my engagement. I don't say this merely because I know Laurie is reading. I say it because it needs to be said. When you find someone that's as crazy about you as you are her AND that you know you can trust, excuse my french, but don't dick around gents--make it official. "No, it's more the cumulative effect of a lot of other stuff.", I replied.

The other stuff would partially consist of an unusually hectic work load but mostly of a sense of despair that this country will ever be able to develop a consensus about anything. For one thing consensus among ourselves would make pundits, politicians and the press less relevant. So they're never going to let that happen. They will make sure they do all they can to keep us at one another's throats. They'll keep us arguing.

Now don't get me wrong. I like a good argument. Ah, who am I kidding--I love a good argument. But argument is the last place anyone's mind will be changed about anything, very simply, because pride will not allow it to happen. It doesn't matter what facts you have to back your argument, intellectual pride makes it virtually impossible for anyone to admit they are wrong. The only times in my life that I have truly had a change in my point of view, or at the very least came to better understand another point of view, were in moments of quiet reflection.

But in a sound-bite nation of 24 hour news networks, Bill Maher, Rush Limbaugh, Al Franken and Bill O'Reilly quietly reflecting on anything is really hard to do. Or not. Quiet reflection is just a push of the "off" button away, I guess. I just need to do more of it. What little I've started doing seems to be helping.

Don't get me wrong. We should stay informed, but just as continuously eating without waiting for digestion would be bad for your body (not too mention messy), so I think continually taking in information without reflection is bad for the mind. At least I'm learning it's bad for mine.